For True Floridians: The Sunshine State

 (nablopomo day 22)

(Got this in an email from my eldest. Which is why I don't live here
(thank you, M.)

Finally, a  true map of Florida that explains this weird, but  wonderful state. Those of you who live in Florida will  recognize it, and those who don’t have been warned  !!!

You  know you're a Floridian if....

Socks are  only for bowling.

You never use an umbrella  because you know the rain will be over in five  minutes.

A good parking place has nothing  to do with distance from the store, but everything to do with  shade.
Your winter coat is made  of denim.

You can tell the difference  between fire ant bites and mosquito  bites.  
You're younger than  thirty but some of your friends are over  65.

Anything under 70 degrees is  chilly.

You've driven through Yeehaw  Junction.

You know that no other grocery  store can compare to Publix.

Every  other house in your neighborhood had blue roofs in 2004-2005.  

You  know that anything under a Category 3 just isn't worth waking  up for.
You dread love bug  season.

You are on a first name basis with  the Hurricane list. They aren't Hurricane Charley or Hurricane  Frances. You know them as Andrew, Charley ,

Frances ,  Ivan, Jeanne & Wilma...Irene. ..Cheryl. ..Rita Mary..Alison

You know what a snowbird is and when they'll  leave.

You think a six-foot alligator is actually  pretty average.
'Down South'  means Key West

Flip-flops are everyday wear. Shoes are  for business meetings and church, but you HAVE worn flip flops  to church

You have a drawer full  of bathing suits, and one  sweatshirt.
You get annoyed at  the tourists who feed seagulls.

A mountain is any  hill 100 feet above sea level.

You know the four  seasons really are: Hurricane season, love bug season, tourist  season and  


You've  hosted a hurricane party.
You can pronounce  Okeechobee, Kissimmee , Withlacoochee , Thonotosassa and  Micanopy.   And know where they are!

You understand why it's better to have  a friend with a boat, than have a boat  yourself.
You were 25 when you first met someone  who couldn't swim.

You've worn shorts and used  the A/C on Christmas and New Years.

You recognize  Miami-Dade as ' Northern Cuba '

You not  only forward this but you understand it

(me, I only understand 'bout half of it)


Batya said…
I was never in Florida, though we do have relatives there. now I must add AZ, the walking clothes dryer to my general itinerary, since my parents moved there to be near my sister.

Maybe some day i'll get to florida...
Lady-Light said…
Batya: My son, now in Givatayim, lived in AZ for a few months. That was enough. At the time, he painted houses, and he said that they had to work at night: too hot (and extremely dangerous) to work at that job during the day.

Anything left on the dashboard of your car during the day would be melted in two hours.

Givatayim is too hot for him; he wants to move to...Alaska!

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